Tuesday, February 26, 2008

I eat in a cemetery

Is it "wrong" to eat in a cemetery?

Recently I've been working at a school in Bexley Heath. It's not a nice school - actually it's a horrible school; the kids are mostly chavs, and it decreases my faith in humanity (or at least British humanity) every time I go there.

So when lunchtime comes around I'm looking to skiddadle from there as soon as possible, and I just happened to find this delightful cemetery a few blocks from the school. It's really quiet, sunny and secluded, and it has memorial seats everywhere.

The only problem is I feel a little uncomfortable when people walk by. Be they mourners or gardeners, I feel the need to look at least a little sad or despondent, so I find myself frowning off into the distance, like I'm adding large numbers in my head.

I also feel the need to think up contingency stories in case anyone happens to berate me for my lack of respect (sometimes it's messy food), so I try to think up plausible connections with the headstones around me. It's pretty difficult sometimes, so that kind of helps with the despondent look I guess.

Maybe it is wrong.

3 comments:

Sweet Olive Press | Helen said...

1) You need to take neat food that can be quickly stashed
2) You can legitimately sit on a memorial seat and think of *anyone* who's dead. It doesn't have to be someone you know personally (lest that make your afternoon at school even more grim) – think of Mozart, if you want.
3) It's not like you're dancing on graves or chortling through a Bill Bryson book – keep your food neat and your thoughts non-hilarious, and you're golden.

Just my two cents.

Ben said...

I would think most of the ground we walk on has at some point be the burial site of someone or something.

So unless you want to stop eating altogether, go ahead and enjoy the serenity of the nicely fertilized public grounds - guilt free.

bitingmidge said...

Be a bit careful about what you eat though,

I suspect that gnawing obviously on any sort of bone would not be cool.

P